How do you get over the end of a relationship?

Don't try to "get over" it, go through it. If you try to get over the breakup of your relationship with another person you will not honor it. The other partner may or may not honor the end of the relationship, but that is not your immediate concern. Your central interest is in learning all you can from the relationship... so you will not have to repeat it again—any of it. So don't try to get over the breakup, try to go through it, and when you are going through it be as thoroughly aware as you possibly can be. Times of transition are rich with possibilities for transforming. Bring your awareness to your experience, your thoughts and feelings,  your emotions and energy, your insights and revelations. The air is thick with insightful breakthroughs and understanding at these times of change in our lives.

When the dust has settled, when you have thoroughly taken it all apart and learned from the full experience of your relationship from beginning to end, when you are enriched with a deeper illumination into yourself, into the other, and into the very nature of relationship itself, you will enter into a period of gratitude. Gratitude for all you shared with the other, gratitude for all that the other and your relationship with them enabled you to learn, gratitude for life and its many multifarious wonders that offer you the opportunity for growth and understanding.

Allow time for a ritual. Burn some essential oil, place a likeness of yourself with your ex-partner on an altar, cook yourself a celebratory meal, or take a long peaceful walk in nature. But whatever you do, however you decide to mark your liberation through insight from the end of your relationship, breathe into your heart and shed the very last tears of attachment and rapture and gentleness, the last shreds of compassion and sadness for the person you were, the person who was in the relationship. Say goodbye to the one who was you, who you were, and walk on into the day anew, refreshed, lighter, wiser, and more mature, more developed, more clear... and more loving.

BLOG entry #9